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Free sticker with every order!

Funniest Christmas Sock Jokes

A meme image shows a Christmas stocking on a tropical beach with the caption "Why did the Christmas stocking take a year off? For his mantel health."

We love sock jokes year-round, but especially during the holidays. Gatherings with family are the perfect time to bust out your best Christmas dad jokes and make your relatives laugh, or possibly groan.

This list of sock puns, Christmas stocking jokes and funny sock one-liners can be slipped into a conversation with friends and family while you unwrap your presents. They also make great jokes to write in a Christmas card, especially when you are giving funny socks as gifts.

So warm up your cold feet on Christmas morning by putting on a new pair of Christmas socks and laughing along with these silly Christmas sock jokes. Let us know your favorite or leave a sock joke of your own in the comments!

1. Why did the man buy his grandson three socks for Christmas?

His daughter said the boy had grown another foot this year.

2. At Christmas, the stores are full of stocking stuffers, but at Thanksgiving, they are full of stuffing stockers.

3. What do you call a holiday sock that won’t leave you alone?

A Christmas stalking.

4. What did the sock monkey eat at Christmas dinner?

Nothing, he was already stuffed!

5. How does a Christmas stocking end a phone call?

It hangs up.

6. Why did the Christmas stocking take a year off?

For his mantel health.

7. What is it called when you use socks as ornaments?

Sockin' around the Christmas tree!

8. What do you call a couple that buys each other socks for Christmas?

A great pair!

9. Why did Santa give someone a foot for Christmas?

He thought it would make a good stocking stuffer.

10. If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get?


11. Why did the three wise men bring baby Jesus new socks?

Because his were too holy.

12. Why does Santa buy all his Christmas socks at CrazySocks.com?

Because they sell socks to fit every personality — and that's no joke!

If you laughed at this list and want to read even more funny sock jokes, check out our blog of the 10 Best Sock Jokes.

Andrea Farrell

Andrea Farrell is the lead buyer and content writer for Cute But Crazy Socks. She is a sock industry expert with over a decade of experience in socks retail, customer service, product selection, product development and customer behavior. Andrea leans on her degree in journalism from Western Washington University to write helpful articles on socks and hosiery, covering all topics from current fashion trends to sock jokes.

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